Divorce is never an easy subject to talk about, especially with children. While parents may be going through a really tough time, kids are still trying to grasp what it actually means and what happens when the other parent moves out. The good news is there are a lot of things parents can do to help their kids cope with the divorce.
Below are some tips from child psychologists and divorce lawyers, which can help your child get through this sad and confusing phase.
Be There for Them
One of the most important things parents can give their kids during a divorce is their time. It is important to reassure them that even if the marriage has failed, their parents still love them and will still be in their lives. It is essential for children to know they are not losing their parents due to divorce.
Keep in mind that actions speak louder than words and your children must see that both parents are still present — talking in person or over the phone, chats, or text messages can help make children feel their importance during these troubled times. Let them ask questions, clarify things, and make them comfortable enough to talk to you about things that they find difficult to understand.
Set Expectations
It is painful enough knowing they won’t be living in the same home with one of their parents and it might come as a shock to find all these life-changing things happening at once. Let your children know the changes that are about to happen. Decide which parent they will be staying most with, which parent is moving out, and all other drastic changes. While there is no easier way to deal with it, it is better that they are aware of what is to come.
Make Room for Adjustments
It will take time to get used to the new normal. Allow children to get adjusted to how things are like during and after the divorce. It is normal for them to be upset over it and become emotional since it is their family and what they have always been used to. Be supportive and allow them to voice out their feelings and concerns.
Take Care of Yourself
You cannot give what you do not have. Parents going through divorce are often depressed and stressed out. Apart from financial matters, there are also emotional and psychological issues that may come with a divorce. Give yourself peace of mind by talking to a trusted divorce lawyer for legal advice, see your psychologist for overall well-being, eat well, and exercise. Your marriage may have ended, but there are a lot of other wonderful things in life that you can focus your energy on.
There is no shortcut to moving on after separation and the same goes for how kids are going to cope with it. Give everyone time to adjust and accept the new situation they are in and eventually find happiness.