Your Options in the Face of an Adultery

Few things compare to the shock and sorrow that adultery brings into a marriage. It destroys the foundations of marriage and throws a massive shadow of doubt on what the future might bring.

If your partner has cheated on you, you need to ask yourself tough questions that will set the path of your life. What is it that you really want? Do you want to stay in the relationship and give it another chance or go on your separate ways? Are you willing to stay married so that your kids can grow in a complete family, or do you want to teach your kids the value of valuing yourself first?

There are a few options for you in the event of discovering a case of adultery. Whatever you decide to do, do it for yourself and your family.

1. Get help to save your marriage.

If you’ve spent time reflecting on what matters to you at this moment, and you’ve decided that trying to save your marriage one more time is what you want to do, getting outside help is crucial to your success.

A marriage counselor will help you and your partner evaluate what happened, what went wrong, and why the cheating even happened. In this process, both you and your partner need to be honest with yourselves, with each other, and with the counselor. This only works if you disclose all pertinent information and if both of you are willing to work together. You and your partner have to be 100% committed to fixing your marriage.

It might feel uncomfortable to open up matters of your marriage to a stranger. But studies have shown that a certain kind of couples’ therapy called Emotionally-Focused Therapy (EFT) is roughly 75 percent effective. It will also help you learn important relational skills such as effective communication skills based on each other’s personalities and styles, how to listen, and how to respect and appreciate each other’s point of view.

It will also hopefully remind both of you why you wanted to marry in the first place and what your hopes and dreams are for your family.

2. File for divorce.

couple filing for divorceIf you feel that you’re ready to move on with your life without your partner, filing for a divorce is the best option. It will officially and legally end your relationship and will help you settle matters such as child custody and property split.

Adultery is a severe crime in the state of Utah, with the perpetrators facing a possible prison sentence of not more than three years. It will also affect alimony.

The first thing that you have to do is to contact a divorce attorney in Salt Lake City. A divorce attorney will advise you on how best to proceed with the case. Often, you’ll be asked for personal testimony and pieces of evidence to prove your partner’s wrongdoing. These can be text messages, chats, e-mails, photos, audio recordings, or third-party statements.

Whatever you decide to do should place your health and happiness first. No relationship is worth pursuing if it takes away your ability to have a positive sense of self and outlook in life. Getting the right kind of help will also help clear your mind and decide on your next step.